Things to know before having a child......

Fifteen things you should know before having a baby.  (And they are in no particular order!)

#. 1. If you're waiting for just the "right time" and/or waiting until you make a little more money.... Simple advice: things don't always go as planned. There will never be "enough" money, and there will never be a "right time". Remember that Big Guy in the sky? Yeah, He has a sense of humor..... But more importantly He has a plan for you. And your future child. Pray above all else. Then the rest will happen as God ordains. As long you put HIM first. 

#2. One kid is great. Bedtime at 8:00, Mommy time at 8:05. Good, full 7 to 8 hours of sleep. One mouth to feed one kid to please. Two kids.... A little more challenging, but still a piece of cake. One kid per parent. Outings are still doable, tantrums are still manageable, and toys are more pick-upable (I'm aware I just made up my own word, thankyouverymuch). Anything more than 2...... Well, it's just one tent away from a full blown circus. And trust me, there are times I think about charging admission to get inside the walls of our home. But the thing is, I wouldn't trade it for anything. 

#3. Trying to clean a house from top to bottom while kids are present--- even if they're nowhere around as you clean--- as in, if you expect them home within 24 hours of cleaning, you would be get much better results if you a.) ate Oreos while brushing your teeth. Or b.)shoveled snow in the midst of a blizzard.

#4. If your kids never pay attention to a word you utter, they WILL (and you can take this to the bank) repeat every last curse word or name calling you so much as mumble under your breath. Believe me. I've been a mom for 8 years and I still haven't learned this lesson!

#5. Kids are so innocent. So incredibly, beautifully innocent. So breathtakingly innocent. Don't ruin it by teaching them that the world owes them and that whatever "god" exists to you is not a good God. And that karma exists to payback evil deeds. Karma does not exist. Satan does. And a man named Jesus bled and died for ALL evil. Give them the chance to at least try that "theory" out. Read to them stories straight from Scripture. And if you're not a Christ-follower yourself, don't blow their chance before they can even think on their own.  You want them to be independent, right?! Give them the opportunity to hear from the best selling book of all time. 

#6. Divorced or married..... Don't ever say negative things about your child's other parent. It's like feeding them a poison that will slowly kill them a little inside with each insult hurled. No child deserves to receive such deadly poison.

#7. Moms: your body will never, EVER be the same. Ever. I don't care how many marathons you run, or how many spin classes you take. With each child your body changes irreversibly. But you know.... Sometimes we struggle with what looks back in the mirror or what number the scales mock us with. However, there has NEVEREVEREVER been a body more beautiful than the one who has held another soul's heartbeat, felt the first kick of life, or experienced the joy of smelling a newborn baby straight from the center of love: a mother's womb. 

#8. Dads: Man up. Treat your wife, your mother, and your sister the way you would expect your baby girl to be treated one day. Set her standards so stinkin' high so  that she won't ever feel the desire to fall for a Bozo, but a Prince Charming. A REAL Prince Charming. After all, you are her king.  Lead her to a prince. If you have a son, show them what it means to be a man. Chivalry isn't dead. Being polite isn't dead. It's not common anymore, but its not dead. Carry on that torch, and proudly hand it to your son one day.

#9. Sleepless nights, or those first few months of midnight feedings with baby are made 110% better if you have a television in your room. Or Facebook on your phone. Not only is it entertainment to keep you from going insane, but it serves as a GREAT nightlight.  

#10. Breastfeeding is all wonderful and great until someone gets bit. 

#11. It's okay to stand back and watch your kids fail at something. Whether its a sticky situation they've gotten themselves into, or something they thought they could handle, but bit off more than they could chew. Bailing your kids out of every difficult situation is not preparing them for real life in the real world. It's a tough world out there. And one day, they will have to face it without you holding their hand and guiding their every step. But when they DO fail, you can still offer to dry their tears or mend their hearts back together. 

#12. Date your children. As in, take them out on real dates. Dads, bring your daughter flowers, open her car door, treat her to dinner at her restaurant of choice (even if its Chuck E Cheese's a.k.a. Hell on Earth).

#13.  Please don't raise your children so that they think the world revolves around them.  Because it doesn't.  And it's a GREAT, BIG world out there.  And the world is not afraid to put people in their rightful places.  

#14.  Make your children drink plenty of water and eat fruits and vegetables early on.  You can avoid a lot of bad habits by this advice.  (And I have learned after 3 children, I should have heeded this advice myself!)

#15.  For the love of Pete!  Make your children BRUSH THEIR TEETH.  It really is not funny to see children who have a mouthful of problems before they go to kindergarten.  It's not cute either.  I don't care if you have to straddle them bucking and screaming to get a toothbrush in their mouth.  Believe me, it's worth the fight.  

Just a little Thursday humor

Love these!

The llama picture makes me literally laugh out loud. Makes me think of my good friend, Kelly, and me. We wouldn't even question each other!!! Everyone needs a friend like that!!!

dotMom

As I stated before, I spent my weekend at a Mom's conference in B'ham, Alabama. Wonderful, refreshing time. Great laughs and memory making were had by all. But I wanted to share a couple of things that I took home with me. That really convicted me. The Holy Spirit did all but shake the ground for me as an eye-opener. So here goes:

#1. Missions. No one knew from one speaker to the next what the topic of conversation would be. It was a total God thing. But they mostly seemed to focus on missions and outreach to orphans around the globe. If you know me AT ALL, you know I am a firm believer in missions. I love serving and I love helping to provide for the needy and poor. I mean, I'm seriously like one of those stray-animal-road-picker-uppers.

My husband loves gadgets. LOVES them. He was drooling over the new iPhone 5. Like, counting down the minutes before they hit the stores. He wanted one so bad. Yet, here I am with an iPhone that looks like it has been stomped, beaten, run over by a Mack truck and yet it still kicks. As in, it hasn't kicked the bucket. But it's due to do so any moment. I knew Chad had his heart set on getting himself an iPhone 5.  Which, Chad doesn't ever buy himself much of anything.  EVER.  So I was okay with him spending money for the phone.  Then he kept telling me he was going to get one for me also since my phone was in such bad shape.  We went back and forth, back and forth.  Finally he said, "Well, maybe I'll just surprise you with it".  I told him plain and simple, "I DON'T WANT A NEW PHONE!"  Long story short, he bought 2 new iPhone 5's.  One for him, and one for..... you guessed it.  I tried so very hard not to be frustrated with him.  I know he means well, but bless his heart, he didn't DO well this time.  So, when I pulled out the information on the little girl from Colombia, South America that I had sponsored, he looked at me like I had just grown 2 heads.  "Really, Mandy? I can't let you go on any of these trips.  You always come back as a sponsor of something or somebody"........ "Really, Chad?  For what that new phone costs you can sponsor a poor, needy, salvation starved child for almost HALF A YEAR".

Chad was back at AT&T the next day returning my phone.

So back to sponsoring this child, my kids have seemed to be really fascinated with it.  Brennan, of course, understands it a lot better.  But we have her card hanging on our fridge and we pray for her at night.

We also have 2 small boxes that have "Nickels for Nets" printed on them and a coin slot at the top.  It's through an organization called "Sweet Sleep" based in Nashville. You can read about them here.) They provide new beds and mosquito nets to children in places like Africa, Uganda, and Haiti.  It only costs $8 to provide a new bed and net for a child.  So the boxes are sitting on our kitchen table.  Almost everyday Brennan has asked questions about it. It has sparked some conversations on missions and how children live around the world.  At breakfast he will just sit and stare at the pictures on the back of the box.  I'm hoping something is getting fired up inside his heart. 

#2. Narcissism.  We talked about what a narcissistic generation we are bringing up.  How everything from the way we are raising our kids and making them the center of our entire universe to social media has geared us up for a very selfish, putting self before others, it's all about me mentality.  It also tied into the fact that we are also one generation away from an extinct church.  Our preacher says that nearly every Sunday.  Chew on that for a minute.  ONE generation away from an extinct church. Sermons these day are based on what makes US feel good...... watered-down faith..... Look at Joel Osteen's messages.  Never has one "preacher" made my blood boil so.  God didn't design us for our happiness.  He doesn't want us to be HAPPY at all times.  That's not what we were put on earth for. Just like my children.  I want them to be happy, but I also want them to fail.  I want them to experience what it's like to fail.  What it can be like to hit rock bottom.  But to be able to find the JOY in the failure and the harsh journey.  Okay, before I get on one of my rant's, I will step off the soapbox and move on......

There were some great points made on getting our children to put others before themselves.  This is something I have always tried to do.  Are my kids spoiled?  YES.  Do they have way too much? YES.  Are they perfect little angels?  NO.  But I try to make it a point to make them see the needs of people around them before they focus on what they have or don't have.  It's a hard job, being a parent, and trying to do it the way that you KNOW is Christ-centered.  Sometimes it seems to be a nearly impossible task.  Some days (okay, most days) I cry out to God asking Him if He's sure He didn't make some mistake by entrusting ME with these priceless gifts.  After all, I only get one chance to do it right. How Chad and I equip them at home, for the short time we have them will determine how they will go out into the world and succeed and fail and raise up another generation.  One of the speakers made a very valid point.  The order in which we should put our lives:  God FIRST.  Spouse SECOND.  And children THIRD.  I've said this same thing before in previous posts.  But it really helps to hear other mothers validate that for me and reassure me that I'm not a crazy, psycho mom.  That I'm not evil by not putting my children first in everything.

There were some other great points made, and perhaps I'll blog about them later.  But for now, some of you may want to think about these things.  And if you are involved in a church, I highly recommend going to this conference.  It is such a great time of refreshment, reinforcement, and bonding with other moms.  Last year was the first year and both 2011 and this year were held in B'ham, AL.  Next year they will have two.  One is in Texas in February and the other is in Chattanooga in September.  We are toying with going to Chattanooga, but it's such a long ride on a church van.  Here is the Lifeway link that shares the events: dotMom

Duck Dynasty

This weekend I have been gone to a Mom's conference in B'ham, Alabama. Super awesome time, super refreshing, recharging time. We went last year, as last year was the first year to have this particular conference. The Duggar's made an appearance and spoke a little in 2011. This year Korie Robertson made an appearance. If you don't know who Korie is, well your missing out on some serious laughter. She is the wife of Willie Robertson from "Duck Dynasty", the hit reality show on A&E. Chad and I don't agree on much television. The only few things we will watch together (after we've recorded them and wait until the kids are in bed)are "Modern Family", "The Middle", "Everybody Loves Raymond" (I know, that's an oldie--- but a goodie), and "Duck Dynasty". This family is hysterical. I mean, HYSTERICAL. Chad and I cry we laugh so hard. But what makes them stand out even more is their faith in God. It's probably the only reality show that exists that the entire family can watch together. New season starts on October 10. Chad and I are counting down the days!!!!! If you've never seen it, take the time to watch it!

Also, I threw in a picture of my friends and me in the backseat of the church van. We were a little delirious. Maybe we were just giddy because we had just eaten a meal at a sit down restaurant and didn't have to yell at any children!

Ethan and Thomas the Train

 Ethan LOVES Thomas the Train.  He saw this cake in the display case at our local Kroger a couple of weeks ago.  He had a total meltdown when I told him we could not bring it home with us.  Then he proceeded to talk about it EVERY. DAY. since then.  He had his HEART set on this cake.  Normally I get my friend, Mary Beth, (talented friend, might I add) to do Ethan's birthday cakes.  But Ethan had THIS cake in mind.  It is a cute cake.  And it comes with a "real" Thomas on top. 

 It was just a family party.  So I tried to keep it simple.  You know.... Keep It Simple Stupid (K.I.S.S.).  But I still wanted Ethan to have a great party.  They're only young once.  And even the not so little things are BIG to them.

 Blue cookies.  You know, to match Thomas.

 I came across these CUTE buckets at Party City.  I knew Ethan would make use of them afterwards, so the $1.99 I paid for each seemed worth it.

 Keeping it with the theme of trains..... as in.... the things that train cars carry.

 I was lost as to what to use for our third bucket.  My friend Melinda suggested gold wrapped candy for gold nuggets.  GENIUS.  And what do you know?! These were actually Hershey "Nuggets"!  GENIUS!

 My chocolate dipping skills STINK.  But I wanted something besides plain, boring pretzels.  But you get the idea..... right?

 And popcorn.  Just because.  My kids have a real, authentic popcorn machine.  Like a miniature version of the kind you see in movie theaters.  So I just assume everyone is like me and  likes to munch on popcorn.  

 Notice the trains around the table and cake.  Ethan did that purely on his own.  He added his own collection of trains for his party decorations.  I have a smart kid.

 Our train table...... turned gift table......

 Chad's sweet Memaw and Ethan.

 My dad and Mary Grace.  She is decked out in her Ole Miss uniform.  'Cause, you know, it's game day!

 My mom and MG.

 I could eat this kid in one bite.

 Ethan's shirt says "I am 4".  Yes, he has a Thomas shirt.  But it's white.  It lasted 5 minutes into the party.

 Even Brennan got a present.  And is that what you think it is?! YES.  My kid thinks outside of the box and marches to the beat of his own drum.  He saw these lightbulbs on a commercial and had a fit for them.  So, I just happened to see them in the "As seen on TV" section as I was checking out at Wal-Mart last night.  You would have thought someone had given him $100.  He's always been your not-so-average thinker.

 See?!  Look at his face!

 I sure love this sweet lady.

 My youngest brother and his fiance, Melissa.

 Ethan was being shy as we sang to him.  Notice the RR tracks on his cake. He decided to play with his train on his cake when no one was looking.  Or he THOUGHT no one was looking.  

 He was telling me what piece he wanted.  And he wanted to make sure he got Thomas off the cake and washed.

 My Mom-in-law and MG.

 This kid is a tornado.  She's taken over her brother's chair. 

WHEW!  All clean and ready for bed!  Four year old's parties are enough to poop anyone out!