Where is that pause button?

So today, as Brennan is getting over his strep and, for the most part us being recluses all weekend, we knocked a big chunk out of our "to do" list. A couple of things on the list included going through Ethan's clothes and storing what he's outgrown (for the possible THIRD boy in the future) and putting a few things in the attic that needed to go. It seemed almost surreal to me.

I don't really want to get all mushy and sappy, but it was very emotional for me. I cleaned out all these clothes that Ethan and Brennan had BOTH outgrown in the blink of an eye, and we put his swing and his Boppy pillow in the attic-- we even put his car seat in the attic. The same car seat we brought both he and Brennan home from the hospital in. The one that is for newborns, up to 25 pounds, rear facing. This time last year he was still in my tummy-- not even ready for this world. And now, he's walking and likes to believe he's king of the house. He even has his big brother suckered into believing it.

Between Brennan starting kindergarten and Ethan reaching all these incredible milestones in the same month, it's almost like the reality of being REAL mom has suddenly hit me. I know I have so much to look forward to as my boys grow and learn, but they also face a lot of disappointments and heartaches in life-- and I know each time their hearts end up breaking a little, so will mine. I just want life to slow down a little. I want to cherish each moment I have. It's so easy for me to take their innocence and every moment I have with them for granted. I love having kids, but, WOW, it is a "job" that never came with instructions, and it's certainly the most challenging, emotional "job" I've ever had, or will ever have.