Random thoughts and a Merry Christmas....

I went to the grocery store for the first time in weeks and weeks. A lot of items in the store had "New Lower Price" stickers. I don't think they really had "NEW LOWER PRICES". I think that is just a ploy to mess with your head. I used coupons and bought things only on sale and still spent $300. And I can't even tell you what I bought that added up to that much! RIDICULOUS!!!

When I went from having one child to two, the transition was EASY. Easier than I thought. Since I already had more than one child, I thought going from 2 to 3 would be a piece of cake! Boy, was I totally wrong. No one warns you of the dangers of going from 2 to 3 because no one would ever want more than 2. So, I'm here to warn you. When you take that pregnancy test for the 3rd child and it shows up positive, it should also have bells and whistles and flashing lights to warn you that you better spend the next 9 months in hibernation just to have the energy to deal with the massive chaos that is headed your way. I mean, I've been working on this one blog post for well over a week now.

I am totally about to become the laundry Nazi. I never seem to finish the massive piles of laundry before there's at least 3 more loads to wash. And fold. And put away. My boys are all about to be limited to 3 or 4 articles (of their own choosing) per week. And I'm trying to teach my pack rat 7 year old responsibility and make him put away his own laundry. It's easier to just do it myself. He crams things in every nook and cranny of his closet. He probably has a million clothes with tags still on them tucked away somewhere in his closet that I had forgotten he had. He's going to be the death of me.

Sometimes I feel like I have to be Super Mom or Super Wife. This is a huge weakness when it comes to my personality. I idolize June Cleaver. She was even married to a C.P.A. like me! OKAY, I know she is just a character on a television show from 50 years ago, but it would be my greatest achievement in life to raise such well-behaved (albeit mischievous) kids all the while having a hot dinner on the dining room table when my husband got home from work, a clean house, a big smile, and pearls and high heels still intact by the end of the day. (No, I don't even own any pearls!) I am nowhere CLOSE to being Mrs. Cleaver. I do good to even wash my hair a few times a week and even remember to breathe every once in a while. But I feel like it's my duty to have a clean house when my husband gets home from work every day. Just yesterday the only time I sat down was while I was in the car rider line picking up my son from school or when I was nursing our one month old. Yet when Chad got home there were dishes in the sink, 2 loads of laundry washing and drying, a load still on the couch that I had yet to put away and the kitchen looked like an atomic bomb went off. And my goal was to wrap a few presents AND have the house straightened by 5 o'clock. I can't even tell you what I got accomplished yesterday, yet I never sat down. Sigh. It's a great thing my husband doesn't expect me to be June Cleaver.......

I have learned the art of Internet shopping this Christmas season. And let me tell you--- it. is. AWESOME. I don't have to be around people, crowds, traffic. Just me and a cup of coffee in my most comfortable pajamas. And you can get some really great deals. I have a junk email address that all of these different companies send promotions to daily. If you take the time and look when you're in the market for a gift, you can get some things for a really great deal.

Okay guys. On a very serious note--- We are about to close out another year. And it seems that with each passing year losses get greater and greater. Just this week, a friend I've grown up with lost her father unexpectedly Monday night. And here it is close to Christmas. The time of year that most people love and cherish and make memories. But then there are families who have not only experienced great losses throughout the year of loved ones, but there are those who lose them so close to such a special time of the year. I was feeling really sad a few days ago thinking about my grandfather and how this will be our first Christmas without him. And yes, loss of ANYONE in your family that you love is hard, but the pain comes in different strengths and forms depending on the person you lost. For instance losing my grandfather was very hard, but I know it doesn't compare to the pain of losing a child. Nor does it probably compare to the pain of losing a parent. Everyone will lose someone they love eventually. I can tell you that having Jesus in your heart and knowing that the person you loved had Jesus living inside of them helps tremendously when it comes to dealing with grief. I'm being pretty elementary here...... Know Jesus, know peace. No Jesus, no peace. Regardless of any circumstances you may be facing. I keep trying to imagine what Christmas is like in Heaven. Or if everyday is Christmas in Heaven. I can't even wrap my brain around how beautiful it must be to worship the birth of our Lord and Savior at His feet. Physically wrapped in His glory and His splendor and His majesty. Even though we celebrate his death and resurrection at Easter every year, if the Son of Man had not even come to this earth, there would have been no one to be the mediator between us and God. There would have been no one to sacrifice his life for the sins of man for all eternity. Having a newborn this time of year brings close to my heart only a fraction of what Mary must have felt as she held sweet Baby Jesus. What was she thinking? Did she even comprehend the magnitude of what her tiny baby boy would endure during His short 33 years? And the simple fact that God chose a simple stable full of smelly animals and itchy hay to be the place to bring His Son into this world. He could have chosen any way to bring Jesus into this world. Yet, He humbled Himself and was born into this world as a human being who would walk this earth and be tempted just as any of us.

I don't know when I'll blog again, moments to sit and type like this are very few these days. Like I said, it's taken me over a week to finish this post. The date at the top is probably from last week.... But, I wish everyone a Merry Christmas. Hold your loved ones extra tight and cherish the moments you have. It sounds so cheesy and cliche, I know. But life changes in the blink of an eye. You don't know when your life will change. And all of us at some point will experience a life-changing situation in the blink of an eye. Have a great Christmas and a fantastic new year!

I actually have a lot more on my mind, but I'm expected at the doctor in a little while for my 6 week check-up, and I have two kids to get ready so they can tag along. Oh joy......

Thankful.....

I must say, that even though Facebook gets my blood pressure way up during election times, and with certain other things, I have still been overwhelmed by my sweet friends over the past week. I have just been so blessed with all the sweet comments over the birth of my sweet little angel girl and even the comments on her pictures.

I have also realized how blessed I am with such sweet friends. Chad and I have not had to worry about a meal since we got home from the hospital and for that I am so grateful. I have truly been humbled by the sweet things my friends have done for me lately. Not only after the baby, but during my pregnancy. I will always be grateful for the people God has given us in our lives.

Meanwhile....... Mary Grace is a week old. I never thought she'd get here, and here she is growing so fast already. It makes me so sad to think about how fast the next several years will fly by. I didn't realize with Brennan, our first child, how fast time goes and how fast they grow. By the third, it hits home with how quickly time flies. Hoping I can hang in there without becoming a total mental case.

Welcoming Mary Grace Clayton........

For some reason Blogger posted all of these pictures randomly, instead of the order I thought I was posting them. So some of these are out of order.

Picture above: Proud Daddy carrying out his princess. You could have knocked him over with a feather. Meanwhile the doctors were finishing up with me-- taking out my appendix and giving me a nerve block injection before they stitched me up.

She was a chunk. A big, healthy baby. 8 lbs, and 5 oz., and 21.5 inches long. That is why I was so fat.

In recovery after her very first feeding. Usually babies can have a hard time learning to latch on and nurse properly. Sometimes there are a lot of tears and frustration involved. Not Miss Piggy. She latched on immediately and she hasn't had a problem since. Do you see her look of contentment after her belly was full?

Ethan has totally surprised me. He has adjusted so well with his new baby sister. As a matter of fact, we have to fuss at him from time to time for being TOO loving. He loves to kiss her and touch her.

This wasn't Brennan's first rodeo, so I wasn't worried too much about him adjusting. He's pretty much carried on as usual.

We got the boys presents from Mary Grace so that they could feel included in all of the excitement.

Our first family photo as a family of 5.

My friend, Lora, made her door sign. She did such an awesome job and even came by on her short lunch hour to fill in the date and other info.

Brennan's presents.

All bundled up and ready to go home.

I just love this picture. E-man's hair just cracks me up!

Leaving the hospital on a very chilly and windy day.

All is well. We are back home and trying to adjust to our new routine. She is already nearly a week old and it just makes me so sad. When I was pregnant I felt SO bad that I thought she would never get here. Now it's just gone by in a blur and I want the magic so I can stop the hands of time for a little while.

Her first check up was yesterday. She was back up to her birth weight (which can sometimes be tricky with babies who are nursed). She is my little CHUNKA-CHUNKA Burnin' Love. But she's a perfect little angel.

38 weeks.......and counting.....

I just returned from my 38 week check-up. Yes, that's 38 as in thirty-eight. I have a new found respect for the Duggar mom. I CANNOT imagine carrying a child once more, much less 16 more. I actually have a new found respect for anyone with 4 or more kids. I don't even think I want my husband sleeping under the same ROOF as me for the next 10 years after I give birth to this kid.

My check-up went okay. The baby's heart rate was just a little low so the nurse hooked me up to a monitor for a little while. In the meantime I sent Chad a text message while I was lying there staring at the ceiling. He works about a mile from the hospital. Usually Chad only has one speed. And that is SLOOOOW. He made it to the 4th floor of the Colonnades in record time. He even beat the doctor in the room. I had also been having cramping in the last 24 hours that felt like they were getting progressively worse. My doctor ordered a sonogram and of course checked to see if I had dilated. Go figure. Mary Grace may be squished beyond BOTH of our comfort levels, but she has yet to do anything about it. Other than keep her head on my bladder. The sono showed that she was around 7 pounds, 10 ounces. For us, that is a BIG baby. And we were also told she had a big belly. She's going to be chunk who loves to eat. Which is what she has turned me into-- which is probably why her belly is so round. She has proven to be a girl who loves drama and she hasn't even graced us with her presence yet.

So, we are still hoping that November 7 will be her special day. Even though her heart rate was low, my doctor said it was by no means dangerously low or low in a bad way. I am, however, miserable. I just haven't felt well and am puffy, emotional, and hungry all the time. And now I am having what feels like horrible menstrual cramps continuously. And I am trying to show determination and endurance and will power. I've completed a full marathon. And now I'm carrying a baby to a full 40 weeks. At this point, I would honestly rather complete a marathon. I'm just determined to make it to the 7th................ I want her to share her birthday with her great-grandfather that she didn't get a chance to meet.

And I've thought about deactivating my Facebook account for awhile. I haven't yet, but I have refrained from being on the site very much. Facebook and politics don't mix and it is very irritating. I find myself to be very opinionated and it gets hard to keep my mouth closed on certain topics. So, instead of my blood pressure going up every few hours, I'm just going to stay away. Especially with it being so close to election time. I haven't deactivated my account because I know in just a few days there are family and friends who are going to want to see pictures of our little drama queen. So until then my actions will be limited.

Radical Ambition.....

Our church just went through a church-wide study during our Sunday school hour for 7 weeks called "Holy Ambition". It's something that everyone should pick up and read. It focuses on Nehemiah and placing our priorities in the right order, becoming PASSIONATE about the kingdom of God, and doing something about it instead of letting the fire burn out.

On top of that, (I don't think it's a coincidence on the timing of "Holy Ambition" and the following) I started listening to "Radical" by David Platt. I had given the book on cd to Chad for Father's Day. Most of our church and leaders had read the book, but as always, I was a step behind. I began to listen to it on the way to work every morning a few weeks ago. "Radical" focuses on the CORE of sharing the gospel, and getting back to the root of sharing our faith in the same way that Jesus did. It has definitely been an eye opener. I really recommend the book "Radical" to anyone who has a heart for furthering the kingdom of Christ. And if you are a Christ follower, that should include you.

In the meantime, between those two books/studies, God has laid something on my heart that I haven't shared with anyone yet. Not even my own husband. Sometimes I get these really silly ideas that seem great at the time and end up being a flop. (Take for example all those crafts I pinned on Pinterest with the great idea that I could do ALL of them!) But, this is a lot deeper and a lot bigger than any craft on Pinterest. This is something HUGE. Something that my thought process can't even digest right now. I just know that something has been laid something on my heart and I won't know if it's a God thing or a me thing until it's covered in prayer. I know if it's a God thing, He won't leave me alone about it (as my preacher once told me). And I also know that things will fall into place with prayer and faith. If it's a me thing, it will turn into another one of those silly ideas that I thought was a good idea at one time. But so far, I don't feel like this is a me thing. Which is why I'm so reluctant to share it (I know, it sounds silly that if it IS a God thing, then why am I reluctant to share it?). I just need you to commit to pray. It's nothing that can possibly take shape any time soon. It's just not possible. (Well, I do know that God's will is always different and it WILL happen when He wants it to happen, so I guess it IS possible--- never question the ability of God's timing--- I have been foolish enough before to think I can). I just think he is preparing my heart and asking me to share it with others soon so that their hearts can possibly be prepared for something so big. So, once I can get my own prayers in order and my thoughts right about this tugging at my heart, I will ask that you please send up a few prayers. The last thing I want to do is ignore something that God is commanding me to do. (Something our sermon was preached on Sunday---and I felt like God was directly speaking to ME, which is why I don't think all of this is coincidence or a me thing.)

I will say that it is a ministry opportunity. And something I never thought I would ever find myself getting too involved in. Who knows? In 6 months, this may be just one more blog post added to the hundreds of others or this may be just a little nudge to get the ball rolling. We can just say that for me this is a Radical Ambition.....

And I will add that I have the most awesome group of people in my Sunday school class that all have a true heart and desire for ministry opportunities. They get on fire for things and I feel like each one of them would be huge part of this-- once I share it!

Just a few pics.....

These are a just a few pics that a friend of mine took for us after my baby shower a few weeks ago. I really didn't want pictures made of me and my fat self, but I knew (especially with this being our 3rd and final child) that I would regret not having any "belly" pictures made. So, I gave in and let her take some pics. She did a great job and they turned out so good (considering the subject matter being photographed). So, here are just a few out of about 300.

Voting on 26.......

Well, it's been awhile since I have done any blogging! (A long time for me, anyway!) Things have been just a little crazy as one can imagine and I've been trying to relax as much as possible (although I'm not sure the word "relax" exists in this household) so that I can encourage Mary Grace to stay put until November 7. So far my weekly check-ups have been going great and my doctor told me yesterday she couldn't ask for better health as far as I was concerned. Other than the pain in my side that I have been dealing with.

Moving on. I have been trying so hard to keep my opinions to myself on the subject matter I am about to bring up. Especially with Facebook and seeing so many other people's opinions on the subject, it is so hard to keep my mouth shut. So I decided to come here to my own personal blog where one can choose to read it or not and where I hope no one will try and start some sort of political debate with me over the subject. I am just like every free thinking American with the right to vote and state my opinion openly. But this subject has become a very sore one for me. I am so sickened by American values and how human life even needs to be "defined" these days. Oh, yes, in case you don't know what I'm referring to-- or in case you live under a rock or are from somewhere other than Mississippi-- I am referring to the statewide initiative Amendment 26 that is being voted on in the general election on November 8.

Again, in case you need enlightenment as to what this is, simply put, and I do mean simply, because it is posted on the ballot just as this: "Should the term 'person' be defined to include every human being from the moment of fertilization, cloning, or the functional equivalent thereof?"

That's it. That's EXACTLY what appears on the ballot. There are those who think that this will outlaw birth control. False statement. Proposition 26 does not OUTLAW birth control. It simply just doesn't support it. The only form of "birth control" that it will outlaw is the "morning after" pill. And one thing in 26 that a lot of people are having problems with and have decided to vote "no" on the ballot is because of the rape and incest issue. In my opinion, a child conceived is still a child conceived. Human life is human life. EVERYTHING under the sun is God's creation. E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G. How many times does the Son of God state how valuable we are as human beings? God takes care of the birds in the air, so why wouldn't he take care of His own children? The first book, the first chapter of the Bible:

Genesis 1:27

²⁷ So God created mankind in his own image,
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them.

I can state my opinion all day on how strongly I feel against voting no. Am I for stem cell research? Absolutely not. Am I for destroying frozen embryos? Nope. I think a lot of people against proposition 26 are afraid of the unknown and what they think this amendment will bring about. From the moment of conception, life begins. There are no "accidents". The God who created this universe with His very hands and breathed life into man knows us before we were even knitted together in the womb. (Jeremiah 1:5) Children are one of the ULTIMATE gifts from God. God treasures our children most of all. He even instructs us to be child-like in our faith.

Matthew 19:14

¹⁴ Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

Yes, I've educated myself on this subject. Yes, I believe the pro-choice people are using scare tactics to make this something it just isn't. I can really get on my soapbox here, but I have said enough. And I'm sure there are those who will read this and disagree with everything I've said. I have carried 3 children and am about to give birth to the 3rd. There is NOTHING more miraculous than growing life inside the womb, just as God intended, and bringing that life into this world. Before this baby even had limbs or defined facial features, she had a heartbeat. A heartbeat. The ultimate sign of life in a human being. You can educate yourself if you need to:

www.voteyeson26.net