Grief, misery, heartache, and desperation are words that probably don't even touch the tip of the iceberg as to what people are feeling after the devastation of this week. I watch the news and see the pictures from the violent, powerful storms that left such a wide path of devastation and destruction and I cannot even BEGIN to fathom what these people who have experienced such a magnitude of loss are feeling.
Tuesday night I woke up from a dead sleep (which is very rare for me to sleep SO soundly) at 3 a.m. to the sound of violent winds outside the house. It sounded much like I imagine a tornado would. Especially when you are sound asleep and shoot straight up in the bed in confusion and panic and the big, tall trees outside are bending like little immature twigs on a young tree. Then the sirens are going off, the television isn't working, and the internet is down, and we are one of the few who have yet to invest in a weather radio. To have such a desperation of trying to figure out just what is going on in the pitch black dark is enough to make anyone come close to a panic attack. Which I just about did.
Then it blew over (quite literally) in about 10 minutes. The winds died down, the rain slowed, and my heart was about to beat out of my chest. Then I was irritated that my sound sleep (which I will say again, NEVER happens for me) was interrupted and I couldn't go back to sleep.
Wednesday afternoon the same thing happened. At the EXACT moment I put Ethan down for a nap, and I was ready for a nap myself. The sirens were going off, hail the size of golf balls were falling from the sky, and it was pitch black outside. My phone was constantly chiming from concerned family members as to what was going on here at home and I was just plain irritated that I couldn't lie down and do what I wanted to do most: SLEEP.
Let me tell you how fast my attitude changed. In just a matter of hours we started hearing news reports of damage in north Mississippi. Then we started hearing about lives lost. Then whole towns wiped off the map. Then it moved to Alabama where the path of destruction seemed to widen even more. Neighborhoods, towns, and lives obliterated. Gone. People missing. Lives forever changed. Boy, did I feel really foolish complaining about the few hours of sleep I had missed.
What did I have to complain about? My house was still standing. My children and my entire family and all of my friends were still accounted for.
Tuesday night I woke up from a dead sleep (which is very rare for me to sleep SO soundly) at 3 a.m. to the sound of violent winds outside the house. It sounded much like I imagine a tornado would. Especially when you are sound asleep and shoot straight up in the bed in confusion and panic and the big, tall trees outside are bending like little immature twigs on a young tree. Then the sirens are going off, the television isn't working, and the internet is down, and we are one of the few who have yet to invest in a weather radio. To have such a desperation of trying to figure out just what is going on in the pitch black dark is enough to make anyone come close to a panic attack. Which I just about did.
Then it blew over (quite literally) in about 10 minutes. The winds died down, the rain slowed, and my heart was about to beat out of my chest. Then I was irritated that my sound sleep (which I will say again, NEVER happens for me) was interrupted and I couldn't go back to sleep.
Wednesday afternoon the same thing happened. At the EXACT moment I put Ethan down for a nap, and I was ready for a nap myself. The sirens were going off, hail the size of golf balls were falling from the sky, and it was pitch black outside. My phone was constantly chiming from concerned family members as to what was going on here at home and I was just plain irritated that I couldn't lie down and do what I wanted to do most: SLEEP.
Let me tell you how fast my attitude changed. In just a matter of hours we started hearing news reports of damage in north Mississippi. Then we started hearing about lives lost. Then whole towns wiped off the map. Then it moved to Alabama where the path of destruction seemed to widen even more. Neighborhoods, towns, and lives obliterated. Gone. People missing. Lives forever changed. Boy, did I feel really foolish complaining about the few hours of sleep I had missed.
What did I have to complain about? My house was still standing. My children and my entire family and all of my friends were still accounted for.
In Alabama.....
Alabama....
Smithville, Mississippi. The whole town wiped off the map in 10 seconds flat.
It's been nearly 6 years since Katrina came through and destroyed so much. People are still trying to get back on their feet after that storm so many years ago. Katrina was bad. Really bad. But Katrina gave us days of warning. People who chose to do so were able to pack up their belongings and get the heck out of dodge. While many of us in the south knew the potential these storms had, these tornadoes didn't give us much warning to pack up our precious pictures of our children being born, our children graduating from high school and college, our deceased mother's wedding ring, our great grandmother's scrapbook of old pictures...... many PEOPLE didn't even make it out. Much less have time to gather up precious mementos of a life full of treasured memories and history.
Today I was reminded by my (almost) 7 year old how ridiculous I can behave. After church, I went through the drive-thru at McDonald's to get the boys a Happy Meal. I also ordered and extra order of fries. After I paid for my meal (including the fries) and got my food, as I was trying to drive out of the parking lot and had 2 kids squabbling at me about whatever came to mind, I realized too late that the fries I had paid for had been forgotten. At that exact moment I was also talking to Chad on the phone and told them the "idiots" at McDonald's had forgotten the fries I had paid for, but I wasn't turning around and going all the way back. After I got off the phone, not only did Brennan tell me that I would not go to heaven if I kept calling the employees at McDonald's idiots, but that it wasn't nice at all to call people names. Yes, that humbled me a lot! Then I was struck like a bolt of lightning hit me that I was acting totally childish about $1.50. What was wrong with me? I was going home to a HOUSE that was still standing and didn't even have something as simple as roof damage from the storms that came through this week. I had food in my cabinet and refrigerator. A closet full of clothes. And I was not sifting through soggy pieces of wood and debris trying to find what little was left of my belongings. It made me want to weep for being so ridiculous. Does that mean that my hormonal fits of rage or irritation are over? No. I'm still pregnant. And I probably won't have any friends left after this pregnancy. But it does mean that I will shut up and be humbled when God speaks to me like He did today over $1.50 of fries being forgotten in my bag of greasy food.
I heard this song this morning and was reminded again of God's goodness in the midst of what we consider tragedies. This has recently become a favorite of mine. If you have an iTunes account, I highly recommend you download it and listen to it DAILY.
It's called "Blessings" by Laura Story.
We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things
Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe
Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise
When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home,
It's not our home
Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
And what if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise
And another song by Chris Tomlin called "God of this City". It reminds us that God is STILL in control and He is still the God of this city.... ALL cities.... and greater things are yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city.......
And above all else..... for each individual picking up the pieces of life after the tragedies of these storms, one simple verse reminds us that God still has plans. This was Brennan's first verse to ever memorize at 4 years of age:
Jeremiah 29:11-12
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.
And on a lighter note..... Brennan had his front tooth just HANGING loose for days. He wouldn't let me touch it. But my friend, Angela, talked him into letting her pull it after church this morning. He told me she didn't hurt him like I did! He is very proud of being a snaggle tooth!!!
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